Whiskey On The Rocks

Whiskey On The Rocks 11.09.14 Your breath smells like alcohol Your eyes are bloodshot red Stumbling around the house when you come home To others you're half, but to me you're dead You pierce my soul with your glare I looked for the man I fell in love with Behind the pitch black darkness Nothing. I found nothing there You've done this before Tossed me to the ground Pinned to a corner and against the wall Called me names; bitch, slut, whore. You'll do it again tonight Before you leave satisfied for a rest While the kids are sound asleep in bed And not a single soul in sight You raise your hand To present me with one whooping blow The seconds of time Tick; Tick; Tick All coming to a stand You swing at three Then it happened I didn't want to do this But you made me You could not have phrased it better When we smiled and exchanged our vows 'Till death due us part That had to come now, not a second later

Guilty.

Guilty. 11.09.14 I'm guilty of wanting what's not mine No matter where I go I'm drenched in rain, no sunshine I'm guilty of knowing that we'll never be The clandestine thoughts Only existing in my memory I'm guilty of staying a friend Supporting you and her From the start 'till the very end I'm guilty of wasting my time On someone who will never be mine.

Honey and Medicine (Chap 4)

Honey and Medicine

Chapter 4

            Survivor. That’s what Samantha Lee dubbed herself as. She had survived the first day of senior year in her new high school. The best thing about it, she was about as invisible as dust. Nobody knew – or rather, nobody cared – about her which made Sam feel rather content. Now she just needed to survive roughly 300 more days then, she’ll get a job and move back to Vermont. New York just wasn’t her.

            By the 18^th year of her life, Samantha, being the ambitious person she is, already had her life planned out. Mapped out and set. All she needed to do was take a few steps and everything would be going her way, just the way she had planned. After high school, she would attend college at UCLA to study medicine. Then, by roughly 26, she should have enough experience and knowledge to get a job and really start working on her career. By the age of 35, Sam planned to get married. She wanted three kids, two girls and a boy. Names would probably come later but Laurel, Lindsay and Jake were on the top of her ‘favourite baby names’ list so far.

           

            By 40, she and her future husband, would already be married, successful, happy and importantly, living in Vermont. She definitely wanted her kids to grow up in the same friendly environment where she grew up in. 55 was the year she and her husband would retire, living in their house, just the two of them, drinking tea and eating honey butter biscuits while knowing that their kids are living their own lives happily.

            As Sam smiled and continued dreaming on, clutching her Jade keychain unconsciously, she ran into someone again, without realizing. Once again, her train of thought was shattered by none other than Kevin. “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Watch where you’re going – Oh Sam! Hi! I didn’t realize it was you, it wasn’t like I was going to swear at you or anything, psch… So… you walk home? I didn’t know that.”

            “There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Kevin. And suuure, you weren’t going to swear at me. I totally believe you. And yeah, I walk home, I don’t live to far off from the school about a ten to fifteen minute walk. I see you walk home too, so it’s not such a big deal is it?”

            “I don’t know a lot about you but by the end of the year, we’ll just see about that. I am after all, the know-it-all in the school, that’s the perks of being the head editor for the school mag after all. Yeah, I walk home too. Ten to fifteen minutes away? I live about ten to fifteen minutes away too! Ha, what a coincidence!”

            “Yeah, coincidence, sure. Anyways, Kevin, I really need to get home right now or my parents will kill me. Bye”

            “Bye! Have a nice day! Oh and not to forget, I still owe you a little ‘tour’ of the flocks and herds of LHS.”

            Sam, waved and she continued walking down to her apartment. Sam thought it was pretty strange that Kevin was still walking behind her listening to his iPod, really not caring as much as Sam. Sam took a right into her apartment block and thank goodness, Kevin did not take that same right but instead kept walking on. A slight feeling of relief took over. She sure wouldn’t want anybody at LHS to be her neighbour or anything like that. That would just be downright awkward. Up the lift and down the hall, Samantha opened the door to her currently, empty apartment as her parents went out, stuck a burrito in the microwave and headed straight to her room.

Giving herself a whif she thought, “Guh, I smell like a dead rat. Bath time, finally...”.

She started to remove her bottoms when out of the blue...

Honey and Medicine (Chap 3)

Honey and Medicine
Chapter 3

“Blah blah blah Y’know! Ha ha ha!…” was all Sam could hear as she sat next to Clarisse. Today was hell but she was a little relieved to have gotten away from that Casper guy. Strange as it seems, she was actually thinking about him. Not in the, oh-My-Prince-Charming!-Come-and-save-me sort of way, more like the, who-names-their-kid-Casper?-like-the-friendly-ghost-Casper? kind of way but nevertheless, he was definitely on her mind.

Samantha was poking at the little steamed green trees on her plate -a vegetable known as broccoli- as she scanned the cafeteria for all the obvious cliques. In every school, there would always be the most popular, hottest, prettiest, richest senior who could basically, get anything or any guy she wanted. 

And at LHS, that girl was Jenine Sapphire Rose. She would go around saying, in a very irritable fashion, “It’s pronounced Juh-Neen not Jen-Nine.” Usually, that sentence would be followed by a remark like Idiot, Retard or Loser. Jenine was blonde with beautifully curled hair, tall, slim like a model, had blue eyes and was always spotted with designer outfits and handbags straight from the runway.

 It was only Sam’s first day at LHS and she already knew so much bout this Jenine girl from Clarisse and hallway gossip. Okay fine, maybe Sam was listening to Clarisse after all, she wasn’t too bad.

In the cafeteria, Jenine was accompanied by her two BFFs, Ashley Greene and Candace Dale. Both of whom are just as gorgeous and rich as Jenine. When they walk in the hallways, people move aside and make way for the ‘Queen Bee’, like the Red Sea separating for Jesus or something. It made Sam feel utterly disgusted at these people but then again, the only way she was going to live through living hell in this dump was to do what everyone else was doing. 

“Sam. Sam!? Hellooooo?” broke Sam’s train of thought and observation time. It was Clarisse calling while snapping her fingers. “I’ve got a new friend for you,” said Clarisse, pointing to Sam’s right. Sam looked to her right and saw some guy had suddenly sat next to her. He was skinny with some black hair sticking out of his clearly over-worn and over-washed beanie and wore thick black plastic glasses. 

“Hi new girl, I’m Kevin, master of the school’s website and head of the school’s magazine. I see Clarisse has been boring you with her incredibly long one-sided talks – “

“Hey, I did not bore her!”interrupted Clarisse, clearly offended.

“Sure you didn’t. Anyways, let me tell you a little bit about the little cliques, or rather as I like to call them, herds or flocks, in our school here.”

“Err… okay. I’m Sam by the way” 

“Sam, nice name. Anyways, moving on, over there in the middle is the popular people’s table. Only the posh of the school get to sit there. As you may already have known the head of the flock is the very infamous Jenine. Usually the table is crowded with freshman and sophomore girl wannabes but Jenine only talks to her two best friends Ashley and Candace. Yeah, you do not want to get in their way.”

“That was not on my mind but thanks for the warning” said Sam

“Yeah, there was this one time I was talking on the phone and I didn’t see her coming. So, I didn’t make way for the three of them and the next thing I know, everybody in the whole school thinks I’m an attention seeker and a fat hobo. I got hate mail for a whole month cause of them.” Said Clarisse, reminiscing of her past.

“Yeah, yeah. That wasn’t even the worst case. I heard there was this one girl who transferred school cause of the amount of threats and ‘accidents’ that happened to her.”

“Wow, that’s pretty serious.” Sam said.

“Okay, over there directly next to the I-am-popular table are the jocks. Most of them are super athletic but super stupid and the rest of them are semi-athletic and semi-smart but all of them are super heartthrobs” said Clarisse with a little sparkle in her eyes. Kevin exaggerated rolling his eyes in either jealousy or disgust. Sam wasn’t too sure.

“Yeah yeah, the leader of the dogs is Jenine’s boyfriend, Rayzen. He’s Eurasian and head of the track and field team. One part Japanese, one part American. He’s the fastest long-distance runner in all of LHS. Previously Jenine dated that guy over there, Casper.” said Kevin as he pointed to Casper with his fork. 

“What? Why? What happened?” Sam questioned, a little too quickly.

“I see someone has caught your attention. Ooh la la Sam!” said Clarisse sounding like a 6 year old. 

“No it’s nothing, he’s in my Chem class that’s all. He’s pretty self-centered.” Said Sam, keeping her cool.

“You can go fantasize all you want about him but there are a ton of girls after him and another ton of girls heartbroken cause of that guy. One of the greatest mysteries of LHS. Why doesn’t any girl come over for this sexy piece of meat over here? Okay, back to the topic, apparently, they broke up because Jenine was cheating on him –or so says Casper. But Jenine declined and said he was cheating on her. Either way, in my opinion, they’re both cheating and lying chickens. But you didn’t hear this from me” said Kevin.

“Oh okay. How about –“ RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING. There goes the bell signaling the end of recess and cutting Sam off rudely. 

“Never mind everyone else for now they’re not as important. I’ll tell you more tomorrow or something” said Kevin hurrying off to his class.

Honey and Medicine (Chap 2)

Honey and Medicine

Chapter 2

                  Leighton High School (LHS) was huge. Its walls were painted peach and the glass on the front door was sparkling clean. ‘The brochure sure wasn’t exaggerating. Damn.” Sam said to herself. She took a deep breath and entered the building hoping that no attention whatsoever would be drawn to her. Upon entering, she saw a huge hall lined with lockers and filled with a sea of students. To Sam, this was a good thing because she would be able to blend in with ease. It would be as if she wasn’t even there.

                  She must have looked either lost or confused because a girl with frizzy red hair, round purple plastic glasses, roughly her age approached her. “Hi, you must be new here. I’m Clarisse Fender of the welcoming committee. Go straight down the hall and enter the third classroom on your right. A small briefing for new students will start shortly.”said Clarisse with a sweet smile. Sam muttered a thank you, unsure if Clarisse could hear her or not and quickly headed off to where ever she was supposed to go. She entered a classroom consisting of about 30 to 40 teens and took a seat all the way at the back. A middle-aged woman, The Headmistress, she assumed was standing in front of the classroom with with a mic. Some of the kids were already conversing with each other while others were pre-occupied with their smartphones.

                  The room came to a silence when the woman in front started talking.

                  “Hello children, my name is Eleanor Fitzgerald, Principle of LHS but you should call me Madam Eleanor. Not Mad E, Mrs Fitzee, Lady Zitzgerald or whatever you youngsters are too free to think of these days. Have I made myself clear?”

                  Everyone must’ve been nodding silently because she continued with her speech.

“As you may have already realized, Leighton High School is one of the more established schools in New York. Therefore, I expect each and every one of you to be on your best behaviour whenever in my compounds. Shortly, you will be given your locker keys and class schedule. One member of the welcoming committee will be by your side for only a day to introduce our facilities and lead you to your homerooms. So make sure you pay close attention. I do not want anybody lingering around the halls within five minutes of the sound of the bell. That is all. Thank you”

Without hesitance, one by one, names were called out for the distribution of the locker keys and schedules and appointment of a ‘Hello Buddy’. To Samantha’s surprise, cheery Clarisse was her ‘Hello Buddy’. Oh, joy. “In exactly 20 seconds after I finish my sentence, the bell will ring and you and your stupidly named ‘Hello Buddy’ will head off to class,” said our Principal with not a hint of a smile on her face.

As Madam Eleanor had promised, the bell rang within 20 seconds of her sentence and all the teenagers exited the room towards their respective classrooms with their ‘Hello Buddies’. Samantha wasn’t really paying attention to the somewhat thousand words Clarisse was saying on their way to her first class. As long as Sam knew where all the homerooms were placed, she would be fine. There wasn’t a need to socialize just yet. Clarisse dropped Sam off and hurried to her own class.

Chemistry 101. At least Samantha was starting the day with one of her better subjects. She took a seat in the middle next to a guy with dark brown hair with his head rested on his arms on the table because the back row was filled. The teacher, a male, with a receeding hairline wrote his name on the board.

E-A-R-L

The man introduced himself as Earl like pearl only with no P.

“Mr. Thompson, glad to see you in my class again, first period of the year and already asleep?” said Mr. Earl addressing sleeping brown-haired guy.

The boy next to Sam raised his head with a smirk and replied, “Just on energy saving mode Mr. E.” Then, the guy turned his head and said “Hey, I’m Casper” to Samantha. Sam could get his whole profile within a blink of an eye. He had green eyes, strong jawline, straight teeth and perfect hair. He was a cutie thought Sam but relationships weren’t what she was looking for till she’s 24 or something.

“It seems you have made a new friend Casper, I’m sure she would like to introduce herself to the rest of the class.”

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. No, I would NOT like to introduce myself to the class. Sam thought as she rose from her seat towards the front of the class feeling her cheeks go hot.

“Erm… hi I’m S-s-samantha L-l-lee from Verm-m-mont” said Samantha stuttering so much it could be remixed into a dubstep.

Mr Earl told her to return to her seat and she was given a sort-of sympathetic pat on the back by Casper with the comment “There there, S-s-samantha the red s-s-snake.” Samantha brushed off that stupid comment and just kept quiet so she wouldn’t draw any more attention to the attention she was already getting from this pain in the butt. She took out her books and the lesson began. Maybe, chemistry wasn't looking to be so fun after all.

Honey and Medicine (Chap 1)

Honey and Medicine
Chapter 1

                  “I’m sexy and I know it. When I walk in the…” Samantha Lee woke up on a Monday morning groggy and crusty eyed to LMFAO’s ‘Sexy and I Know It’. “Worst. Alarm. Ever.” Sam would tell herself every morning but wouldn’t change her alarm tune. Her feet touched her cold bedroom floor. Her new cold bedroom floor. It’s been exactly a month since she moved to New York and she already hated it. She hated the noisy streets, crowded people, expensive everything and her new little cramped up apartment. But who was she to choose? It was her parents’ choice after all.

                  Sam dragged herself to the bathroom and washed her face. She brushed her teeth twice as long as she normally would, gargled her mouth twice and washed her face with ‘Extra Glow Face Cleanser’. After all, it was her first day at Leighton High School. She needed to make sure her breath smelt great and her complexion was pimple free. Then, she skidadled over to her closet and picked out her favourite white polo tee, black skinnies, a mini black vest and a grey beanie Lexi, her best friend in Vermont got for her from England. Sam checked herself out in the mirror and contemplating, “Not slutty, not eye-catching and added points for comfort. Samantha Lee, this is New York. Make sure you don’t stand out. Just blend in and maybe you’ll survive.”

                  After that, she had her breakfast, of cereal and milk. Alone, of course. Samantha’s parents are never awake this early. Mainly because their high-paid jobs require them to work extra late in the office. By 7.30a.m., Samantha was out of the apartment, and walking to school a mere 5 blocks away because her dad, who is Chinese always puts education first. Typical typical Asian, Samantha would say. Sam clutched her green Jade (her birthstone, or so says TeenChic) keychain in her right hand for luck. Even at this hour New York was already hustling and bustling with aspiring actors and depressed journalists off to work or maybe even back from work. Before she knew it, Sam was standing in front of Leighton High School’s front door.